Kinda glad I gave Floaty, Pope VinnyLXIX, Guido the Snitch, and Bloaty the day off yesterday. I don't know much about the new guys, but I do now that when I hire good people, I trust them.
*thud*
What in the cornbread Hell was that?
Hello? Who's out there and what's that God awful smell?
Oh hey Bloaty. You okay?

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just hit my head on the door coming in."
Um Bloaty? We don't have business hours on Saturday here at Air Trafffic Mike Heavy Industries, LLC.(the official social think tank of Air Traffic Mike).
Didn't you read the new employee handbook, "Getting Started And Other Important Shit"?

"I did Mike but I felt guilty about starting a new job by taking the first day off."
Ambitious and with a conscience. You'll do well here my friend.

"Thanks for the opportunity Mike. I won't let you down."
I'm sure you won't, kid. So tell me, how did you end up dead. I mean, if you don't mind me asking.

"Not a problem Mike. I was rumaging through some trashcans one day last year. A car lost control. They hit a pole holding some power lines and took it out."
Did the pole get you or the car?

"Well, neither or both I suppose."
Really?

"Yeah, it was the damnedest thing. The pole came crashing down on the cans sending them everywhere, mostly on and near me."
That had to be terrible.

"It was. I was stunned, but unscathed."
What happened next?

"I felt I was lucky to be alive. I decided to get out of there but I then I made a serious error in judgement."
What was that?

"I pissed on one of the trashcans."
So?

"It had hot wires all over it."
OUCH!!!!!!!!

"You're telling me. A flash of light, a puff of smoke, and the smell of burnt fur filled the air. This is pretty much how I landed."
Tough break there Bloaty. So what are you working on?

"I'm doing the weekly horoscopes."
No shit? I wouldn't have picked you for one of those guys.

"What can I say? Its a gift."
But you didn't see the "trashcan frying pan" coming at you, did you.

"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr."
Whaaaaaat?????

"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr."
C'mon Bloaty. Don't be "That Guy".

"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr."
You've got to admit that was a little funny.

"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr."
Okay, okay. Settle down. *holds his hand down* Here, friend, smell.
*sniff*

"Sorry Mike, its still pretty fresh in my head."
No worries Bloaty. You're free to speak your mind here.

"Thanks Mike. I'll have the horoscopes ready by tomorrow morning."
Okay Bloaty, just lock up when you're done.
Guess I'll go check on the Festival.
Air Traffic Mike
2 comments:
Man, this is just BAD, BAD , TASTE!!! NOT GOOD!!!
"Anonymous said...Man, this is just BAD, BAD , TASTE!!! NOT GOOD!!!"I'm pretty sure my sense of humor isn't for everybody.
Unfortunately "Bloaty" is a beloved member of the team.
He'll be staying with us.
I really do mean this when I say "thanks for stopping by".
Love it or hate it, feedback is always welcome within certain rules.
;)
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