Wally: 1, Groundhog: 0

My best friend always says that one of the annoyances of living on a farm is "the critters".

"Animals" live on a farm by design, "critters" are there as parasites.

Such is the case of groundhogs. One in particular had been rooting holes on the east end of Pat and Lisa's property for the last two years. At least until last night about 7:00pm.

Splitty the Maul was on the east porch relaxing in a rocking chair.



I'll let him take it from there.



"Ah saw it aaaaalllllll!!!!!!!!!!"



"Ol' Wal come out the side door an' let outta yelp. He said, 'Splitty, 'ere's dat danged ole groundhog at's been pissin' in Paw's oatmeal ever' mornin' fer a cuppla years.' ""

So what did he do Splitty?



"He ran inside like a moonshiner fetchin' his gun to shoot a revenuer. He grabbed the pellet gun, took aim, and knocked it's dick in the dirt."

How far away was the critter Splitty?



"A hunnert an' fiddy feet out."

A hundred and fifty feet? Really?



"Ah saw it aaaaalllllll!!!!!!!!!! Lookee here."





"Its a biggun, ain't it?"

Certainly is Splitty.



*sniff*

"Ah couldn't be prouder of the boy, ATM."

He's a great kid Splitty, no doubt.

The fact that he nailed it with the one pump pellet gun makes it even more amazing.



"Raght thru the dang throat Mike."

There you haver it ladies and gentlemen. The Uncle Splitty 2009 "Knock Your Dick In The Dirt" award goes to Wallace Patrick Lloyd.

Some days this blog just writes itself.

Air traffic Mike, ret.

Another One For The "Nuh-Uh" Girl

Last weekend I posted a food blog about The Reading Terminal Market.

I dedicated it to my friend Rebecca. She, like my best friend and I, is a foodie through and through.

Oh, you'd like to see her? I don't have any pictures of her on my new laptop. However, I do have some resources. Here's a looksee courtesy of Paul Ryburn's blog. Paul loves to tease her. He's quite good at it.

Pretty cute, isn't she.

So anyway, yesterday Team Lloyd and I went to the Italian Market in South Philly.

Want food?

They've got it all.

Once again, this is dedicated to Rebecca.

"Nuh-uh".

Uh-huh.



Need live crab fresh from the Delaware or Chesapeake Bay?



Got it.



How about some fresh produce to go with it.



Fresh pork for Sunday dinner? Done.



Just about any type of seafood is available in the market.

But next, Esposito's!



I first set foot in Esposito's at the age of six. I went with my Grandmom and great Grandmother. They still butcher thier own meat and create their own rolled roasts.









This evenings dinner, beef brasciola braised in spaghetti gravy. Otto, note the outstanding use of bacon on the left.

Now I'm not sure of a recipe for the meat advertised below, but what a good price!



I guess you could get four of them and put them under a rib roast for a "standing" rack of veal.

We left out of Espisito's much heavier in meat and much lighter financially. However, we were far from being finished.

We walked down to Sarcone's bakery to score some fresh Italian bread and some tomato bread to snack on.



Wally, Dr. Lloyd, and Q.



Q. and Lisa.

Interesting story here. See the place on the left called "Ralph's"?



The sign says it all. Mea culpa on the poor quality of the shot.



Here are some street scenes:









Having purchased a large volume of groceries by this point, Wally, Q., and I took a trip to the car to load the meats into the cooler.

Our day was still far from over.

We met back up with Pat and Lisa at Claudio's. Claudio's is a must stop for the good Dr. and I.



It is a bit tight inside, but well worth it. All kinds of good imported olives, olive oils, local breads, pasta, aged provolone cheese (you don't know what sharp cheese is until you had thier aged provolone), soprossata (hot or sweet), prosciutto, and cured meats.







Claudio's would be our last stop in the Italian Market.

As I said earlier, Philly is a foodie paradise. I haven't even mentioned the Asian market in Chinatown or the seafood market where local fish comes off the boats and trucks.

I've got to close this one out here. Time to make a pot of gravy for the evening meal.

Note: "gravy" = spaghetti sauce for those unfamiliar with the term.

Once again a shout out to the "Nuh-Uh" girl. Rebecca, for being such a good sport I picked up a food book entitled, "Gravy Wars: South Philly Foods, Feuds, and Attytudes". Send me your mailing address via Facebook and I'll get it in the mail this week.

Until next time all y'all take care of yourselves and have a good Sunday Funday.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

Mr. Collins, Mr. Collins........

please, Mr. Collins.

In a perfect world this man would still be alive.

I hate cancer. It took my Mom. It is taking my brother Bruce. Six months after I saw Albert Collins play B. B. King's club in Memphis, he too, was taken by this insidious disease.

Fuck cancer.

Fight on, victims.

Play on, Albert.

Thanks for the autographed CD, the music, and the memories.



Tomorrow, the post for the "Nuh-Uh" girl with pics from the Italian Market. Too tired to post. Great day, though.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

:)

FOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Scrapple frying.



ATM, are you REALLY going to fry that chicken in LARD???????!!!!!!!



Oh yeah baaaaaaaayyyyyybeeeeeeeeee!



Like there was ANY doubt?



WTF is this?



Fried crabs (using butter and Old Bay seasoning).



All I can say is, the lobster tails were worth every penny.



Smoked beef short ribs. (over hickory)

Tomorrow, the Italian Market.

Tomorrow afternoon, another post for the "Nuh-Uh Girl".

Hope you folks like it.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

It's Here!

A brand new log splitter!



Now you might be thinking, "ATM, that's pretty "redneck" getting all excited about a log splitter.".

I agree. That IS pretty "redneck". But hey, after 25+ years of a sedentary, but stressful career, I'm pretty happy getting out and doing laborious work.

I paid for my college degree with thousands of gallons of sweat. I think every child going to college ought to have to work a hard, grinding outdoor job for at least one Summer and pay for that year of school.

It sure as Hell would make them appreciate their parents and the value of a dollar.

But I digress.

While I was over in Delaware something caught my eye.

Seriously.

He was cute sitting there with the others. The red, shiny coat just melted my heart.

I tried to walk away. My legs wouldn't work.

I tried to look away. He kept staring.

I tried to think of what I was supposed to be doing in the store. My brain wouldn't budge.

I had no choice but to adopt him and bring him home to the farm.



Ladies and gentlemen, meet "Splitty the Maul".

I told you he was cute.

How cute? Look at this:



Splitty jumped in the front of the truck so he could ride "shotgun".

I don't know about you, but where I come from, that's cute!

So now you might be saying, "ATM, with a 27 ton hydraulic log splitter, why the maul?".

Fair question.

The answer?

I'm pretty damn good with a splitting maul. The log splitter works on most pieces, but sometimes you have to get in there by hand.

Sort of like girls in that way.

Besides, as I stated above, after a quarter century of working inside, I'm pretty happy working up a real good sweat.

I think Splitty and I are going to get along just fine.

Now, for your bad pun of the day. The picture was taken on the Delaware river in front of the Riverview Inn.



"It takes a Hell of a lot of gull to say that.".

I told you it was going to be a bad pun.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

More From The "WTF" Files...

Are you shitting me?

This gets a "double Dumb Ass" here at Memphis Mike's.

Sheeeeeeeesh.



"Maybe she'll adopt me, ATM."

I hope not Bloaty.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

So What Happened To All The Trees? (Part 1)

You all saw the pics from "Air Traffic Mike's World Tour 2009". We took down twenty some trees.

In an hour, I'm going to pick up a 28 ton hydraullic log splitter and two splitting mauls.

Pilates has NOTHING on splitting firewood as far as workouts go.

Pain and pics to follow.

On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia. (Quote W. C. Fields)

:p

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

I Could Have Gone My Entire Life Without Seeing This

"Butt odor"? SERIOUSLY?

The website ad speaks for itself.

I'll just leave it at that.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

Good Muggy Monday Morning

Courtesy of Hurricane Billy the humidity is still running around 115%. Fortunately, we have fairly cool temperatures to work with today.

Rain moving in from the south over the Delmarva Peninsula will keep any barn activity to zilch.

A broken barn is NOT the place one wants or needs to be in a storm.

Besides that Qbert has an orthodontist appointment today so he's out of the mix.

I think Wally might be jealous.

So without Q, Wally and I will embark on the "Lawn Care Family Tour". Pat has many elderly aunts and uncles, along with his Mom who can't get out and cut the grass. After all the rain, it is growing right in front of us.

That's just how South Jersey rolls in August.

Later taters.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

One For The "Nuh-Uh" Girl

Yesterday was a complete washout. Rain all night Friday, rain all day yesterday.

So what's a brother to do on a rainy Saturday morning?

Cook crab claws. My standard boil. Three quarts of water, one can of beer, two tablespoons of Old Bay seasoning.



That occupied a few minutes until Dr. Lloyd returned from an early morning meeting.

Pat's like me when it comes to food. It is a passion. We decided to go into Center City Philly and go to the Reading Terminal Market.

I hadn't been there in about a decade.

I got to telling Pat about my friend Rebecca from Memphis. I told him about her, how tiny she is, and how she came upon the nickname, "The Nuh-Uh Girl". She's a kindred spirit to us in the foodie world. I told Pat, "She'd love this place.". He asked, "Got your camera?". I pulled it out of my pocket.

"Then take the girl some pics.", he suggested.

So then, without further ado, this one is dedicated to Rebecca.

"Nuh-Uh".

Uh-Huh.



There's an oyster bar as you walk in.



Termini Brothers bakery. Pastries that are out of this world.



There are many seafood mongerers there, but these shrimp caught my eye. To give you an idea of their size, those are one pound containers of crabmeat next to them.



One of the many sandwich stops inside the Market.







The Iovine's Produce "stand". They've got damn near everything.



Dr. Lloyd and some fresh Peking duck.







Downtown Cheese. We spent just over $150.00 on cheese and sausages. We spent a new record $40.00/pound for a French cheese with black truffles. It is worth every penny of it too.



Got beer? Yes we do!



Got Flying Monkeys? Apparently so.



Got Prime Rib?



Air Traffic Mike does! Sorry Rebecca, there was none leftover.



Gotta have the right seasonings if you're going to cook Prime Rib, capiche?



The line for these folks sandwiches was insane.



It's Philly....ya had to know there'd be a cheesesteak somewhere in the market.

I have more pics but I'm going to close it off with this final one.



Dessert. It wouldn't be a Pennsylvania market without the Amish selling baked goods.

All in all a pretty good Saturday after all.

Next time you need a quick weekend getaway Rebecca might I suggest downtown Philly?

Until next time all y'all take care.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.