Christmas Cards/ATM's Official 2009 Christmas Greeting

Yeah, like I really have time for Christmas cards. I run out of time in the day half an hour before I get up.

I didn't think there was ANY way I'd be able to get my holiday message out.

Then it struck me. I have technology on my side.

I decided I'd have my official Christmas greeting done online.

You know, some days I'm a real genius.

I'll be sure to let you know when I have one of those days again, okay?

When I'm not having one of those days I rely heavily upon the gang over at Air Traffic Mike Heavy Industries, LLC. (the official social think tank of Air Traffic Mike).

I delegated the task to them.


Pope Vinny LXIX is the point man on the gig. He's on his way over to drop off the the project. He mentioned on the phone that him and the gang were able to make it tasteful AND a source of holiday income through marketing.

*slam*

Speak of the devil, here he is now.

Yo Vinny, how's it hanging?


"How ya doin'?"

Hey Vinny, don't Christmas and marketing go together like Jesus and Wall Street?


"Don' worry aboud it, capiche?"

Are you sure your Popeness?


"Positutely."

So what kind of business am I pimping?


"Um,....er....oh yeah...it's uh RK's Cafe'.

RK's Cafe'? Never heard of them. They on the up and up?


"Would da Pope evah steer ya's wrong?."

Well Vinny, there WAS that one time you....


"EH, eh EH!!!!!! We'll have none of dat. Dat wuzz a long time ago. I've gone clean, capiche?"

Okay Vin, I'll take you at your word.


"By da way, dis one's on us guys. It's our Chrstmassy ting frum us, ta you."

*sniff*

Damn it Vinny I'm getting choked up here. You guys are the best. I'm going to have to at least give all y'all a raise.


"Meh, times is tuff ATM. Us guys at da choich have had to back off the number of *sinkings*. If we can't take more from dem bastards in da flock, we can't take more from you."

Well gee Pope Vinny, that's really kind of you and the gang. Are you sure I can't offer you guys a raise or something?


"Fuhgeddaboudit. I gots ta run ATM."

*slam*

There goes a true man of God.

Well then, without further ado, my official Christmas greetings to one and all for 2009. Just click right here.

Until the next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

I'll be busy in the meantime writing crib notes for my next Confession.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

(Note: Link to roadkill cafe' for parody's sake only. Air Traffic Mike's has no interest and no affiliation with the site other than being a fan. Thanks for the laughs whoever you guys are.)

SplittyCam!

Splitty the Maul was restless yesterday. He said he was tired of sitting around inside.

Let's face it, after being couped up for four or five days who doesn't get cabin fever?

I thought it over for a few moments. The day was sunny and the temperature was hovering around 60 degrees.

I looked over at Splitty and asked, "You wanna watch the early football games at Sneeky Pete's?


Splitty, who had been working off his Thanksgiving intake, dashed off to get his video camera.

By the time I got out of the shower, Splitty was already in the front seat of the AirTrafficmobile.


"LET 'ER RIP!!!!!!!!!", was the first thing out of Splitty's mouth.

I pulled away from the curb.


Splitty was not impressed.

Mauls dig speed. I'm rather fond of it myself, but in a subdivision with children outside playing, I have to restrain myself. I explained that to Splitty.


Splitty wouldn't hear a word of it.

I cranked up the CD player, and Splitty started to roll video of the trip to Sneeky Pete's.


Splitty digs Professor Longhair's piano playing.

While en route it occurred to me that the last time Splitty was at Sneeky Pete's, he had a little problem.

He got shitty drunk and propositioned our server:




...with predictable results.

As you saw in the video, we got to Sneeky Pete's in short order.


Splitty was at the door in seconds flat.

Splitty was ready to get his "drink" on.


Splitty ordered his usual, a Miller Lite and a shot of Jagermeister.

I ordered a small pitcher of beer and a cheeseburger.

Being a Philadelphia Eagles fan, I was in hostile Washington Redskins territory.


Splitty, not realizing the danger, sat amongst the Redskins fans.

The Eagles recovered a Redskins fumble with seconds to go in the first half.

Splitty, three rounds of drinks into his day, found out why taunting drunk rednecks is a bad idea.


Splitty got his handle "knocked into the dirt".

That would be it for Splitty.

I carried him back to the car to let him sleep it off.


I'm beginning to think mauls can't handle their liquor.

The Eagles went on to win the game. I paid my bill and left for home.


Splitty was still out.

Good thing Splitty is well rested this morning. Today starts a busy couple of days here. Bruce has chemotherapy today and Sis is getting some lab work done for a procedure she's having done tomorrow.

My departure for Memphis is contingent upon how well she does over the next couple days.

As always, if needed I'll stay.

That's what the "AIR TRAFFIC MIKE WORLD TOUR 2009" has been about since the get go.

You folks have a good day.

I gotta go wake Splitty up.

Until the next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

Wow, The Things I Miss...

I woke up early this morning. 4:00 am to be exact. No particular reason. There's nothing new weighing heavily, or any more heavily, on my mind. I'm rested, content, focused, and looking forward to whatever the day brings me.

I opened up my laptop and a cold Diet Coke and started reading my emails.

Last night my high school class held our 30th reunion. In conflict, I also missed a "Snuggie Pub Crawl" in downtown Memphis.

Okay, let's get one thing straight. I'm NOT what they call the "Target Audience" for Snuggies. I gave up my "blanky" somewhere around the age of three. However, putting on the Snuggie was for a good cause and the second part of that does say "Pub Crawl".

Drink beer for charity? I'm in.

This year, I've been invited to join the "Stumbling Santa's".

That is going to make one Hell of a blog entry.

But I digress.

My 30th high school reunion would have been a blast. My graduating class was likely no different than that of others in terms of talent, scholars, miscreants, self loathers, and self destruction. Like in any large, diverse group of people, success, mediocrity, and failure will spread themselves out to varying degrees across the group. One can only hope that the median lies somewhere between the first two for all concerned.

For the most part I've been able to keep up with some. My best friend and my oldest brother still live back home. Both of their networks are rather large. Between that and Facebook, it has been fairly easy to catch up on a number of my classmates.

The success stories seem to far outweigh the failures. By that I mean the majority of my classmates have gone on to be good citizens. Real success in this world is overcoming the day to day struggles of life, going to bed, and getting up to do it again.

There are those who see divorce, bankruptcies, unemployment, and hardship as failures. They can be, but only if you let them.

Like a wise man once said, "Falling down is not a crime, not getting up is.".

I would have liked to have been there. There are more than a few of them that have made positive impacts in my life. Some were small instances from long ago, some more recent. Some of those came from observing, some by direct interaction.

A prime example is the woman who first broached the subject of the reunion (so far as I know). As a child she was always a sweet kid. Her enthusiasm was contagious then as it is now. She, like the rest of us, has had some tough times in her life.

Some folks let bad times turn them bitter. "Bitter" is a terrible loss in life. "Bitter" is also the easy way out, allowing one to lay the blame to their problems elsewhere. When "bitter" takes up residence in your life, you just moved to the "mental ghetto".

I don't think this girl has had a bitter day in her life. Maybe a bitter moment here and there, but we all have those moments. The woman that child became is still the same nice, sweet, intelligent, and enthusiastic person I knew way back when.

That's how I define success.

I can barely quantify the impact my best friend has had on me. That would take a series of books, not a blog.

He knows how I feel. He reached the level of "brother" many decades ago.

There are many influences from my class, but time this morning and space here don't permit me to post it.

Let me just send out a blanket, "Thank You" to the Class of '79.


"Cheers folks"

I wish the circumstances would have allowed me to attend.

When this road trip started I knew the things I wanted to do would be compromised by the needs of my brother, and as it turned out, the needs of my best friend as Bruce's health permitted.

A season of Memphis Redbirds baseball games lost? No whoop. I love baseball, but in the end it's still just baseball. The stadium will still be just right up the street from me when I get home.

Missed the Memphis In May World Championship Barbecue Contest? Been there, cooked in it. Love the event and it takes place just around the corner from my condo.

I can't count the number of live music, theatre, an sporting events that have come and gone in and around my home in Memphis since the start of May.

It would seem, in hindsight, that I've missed many things this year past.

The truth is that I haven't missed a thing.

I've seen it all.

I've seen what God meant for me to see.

Oh, about the class reunion?

I got to "see" more from that than I could have ever imagined.

Guess I'm going to have to send a nice lady some flowers.

Just an old kid's musings on a beautiful Sunday morning.

The next couple of days are going to be really busy, possibly including my departure for Memphis.

I'll know in a couple of days.

Until the next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

Thanksgiving Day Fun Day

Well, this seems odd.

It's Thanksgiving Day. I'm not at work. I'm not cooking. I'm not sitting down trying to figure out how I'm going to get it all done.

I'm up early, eating a meatloaf sandwich for breakfast, reading emails, playing cards over at www.pogo.com, and enjoying the peace and quiet.

For the first time in many moons, I'm spending a holiday with family.

My sister-in-law's mother is handling the cooking. I was going to volunteer to help when I overheard Sis tell a friend on the phone, "Mom and Dad do all the cooking.....".

Hey, who am I to interject myself on a family tradition? Besides, I really like Sis' mother's cooking.

Still, it feels odd being away from Memphis this time of year. Last year we had a pot luck dinner at Calhoun's. From the outside, Calhoun's is a beer joint on the south end of downtown. Honestly, we see it more as a clubhouse.

Comfortable places as such are hard to find.

Last year I made turkey with a cornbread/sausage dressing and a spiral sliced ham. I cooked it after I got home from work. No mean feat getting it done, but the turkey was a fairly small hen (about 13 pounds), and I had prepped the cornbread/vegetables/herbs the night before. Spiral sliced ham is an easy bake and serve sort of meat.

It wasn't like there wouldn't be enough turkey there. Max and the gang were deep frying turkeys as well. Someone else had also bought in ham. There were side dishes galore.

Our potluck dinner put a lot of restaurants best efforts to shame.

It wasn't the relaxing sort of Thanksiving I grew up with. I had to work a 5:45 am shift the next morning. I had been working six day work weeks for the previous year and was still working six day work weeks at the time.

When moments that should be restful and relaxing aren't, a change is needed.

It has been a year since then. This morning I'm relaxed.

I got up when I was ready to. I'm doing next to nothing. My brother is still quite ill, but he's still here too.

A bigger blessing doesn't exist.

There are obstacles for us as a family up ahead, none of which I care to dwell on or share at this moment.

For now, we're on relatively calm seas.

We all realise what a true blessing that is.

I hope all of you have that today, and everyday, as well.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Until the next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

Cornbread Dressing For Breakfast

I'm a big fan of leftovers in the morning.

I suppose it stems from my late brother Gary and I conducting "raids" on the refrigerator starting when we were children.

Gary and I weren't picky eaters as children, we were professionals.

Gary and I were a notorious "snackers". Gary however, was an inspired genius. He'd make a sandwich out of anything. In the short 24 years we were blessed with him, he invented such household culinary legends as:

"Mashed Potato Sandwich"
"Spaghetti Sandwich"
"Beef Stew Sandwich"
"Stuffing Sandwich"

Are you sensing a trend yet?

The kid loved his carbos. I always took a bit more time opting for a small portion of pot roast, ham, or especially during the holidays, turkey.

Normally, by that time, he'd already be up in bed with his "sandwich" in hand and I'd get yelled at to get out of the refrigerator.

Now let me take the time to point out something. The term "sandwich" is being used loosely here. Gary's idea of a "sandwich" in this manner of dining was to grab a slice of white bread, open the refrigerator, run it through whatever the filling was going to be, and quickly take it up the stairs.

What parent was NOT going to see the big trail left behind in the mashed potatoes?

He always was fast for a kid his size.

Generally that left me holding the refrigerator door as one of our parents woke up.

Not always though.

As we got older it just became an accepted fact that one or both of us were going to make a run on the fridge.

Thanksgiving was the best of times for the two of us. Our parents always made a large turkey, some years in excess of 28 pounds pre-cooked weight. There would often be a ham as well. Add in the requisite side dishes and you get the point. That meant leftovers and lots of them.

We lived in a split level house. The recreation room and laundry were halfway underground. By November, when the temperatures would fall, the laundry room was pressed into service as a food storage room. Our parents would drape a damp towel over the turkey, place foil over that, and store the carcass on top of the washing machine. Many times the ham was there to keep the bird company.

For a couple of kids already angling for a run on the food larder, it was immediately in harm's way.

Late night Thanksgiving turkey and ham sandwiches are still the best.

Sometimes there would be some side dishes in there with it. The combinations then were staggering. Turkey, mashed potatoes, corn, and cranberry sauce curled up on an overworked slice of white bread still remains one of my all time favorites.

Did our parents know we were going to do it? Sure. I think Dad came to expect it and Mom just gave up.

It's not like we were eating junk food.

For Gary, it would set the course for his later eating habits.

He never sent a plate to the sink that wasn't wiped clean with a piece of bread. Even in restaurants. He loved going to our maternal Grandmother's house on the second Sunday of the month. It's the day she'd always make spaghetti sauce. It was always loaded with good garlicky meatballs, braciole, a piece of boneless pork, and piece of boneless veal.

Honestly, it was a sandwich just waiting to happen.

Like I said, even in a restaurant, he'd make something into a sandwich. Mashed potatoes and gravy was one of the more common ones. French fries got sandwiched more than once.

The last full holidays we would spend together would be the Thanksgiving/Christmas holidays covering 1983-84. I had graduated from college and was getting ready to start my career in February. Gary was in is Junior year at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond, VA.

Every partnership has to have it's "Last Hurrah" and ours was no different. We knew our lives would be on different paths as we started our careers.

As young men and women do, especially if they're in college or just out, we spent a great deal of time visiting friends. I was also working nights so we would rarely see each other until after 10:30 pm.

Just about the perfect time for late night snacks.

I'd get home. Shortly thereafter Gary would get home. We'd make our cursory run on the refrigerator and reminisce about our escapades over "sandwiches" and beer.

Too soon it would be over.

The holdays are nigh upon us again. Soon the aroma of roasting turkey, candied yams, ham, mashed potatoes, green bean casseroles, and cranberry sauce will fill the air, our bellies, and the refrigerator.

I'll be there, slice of bread in hand, late Thursday night.

I'll close my eyes and listen carefully to the night.

I'll "hear" Garys voice whispering, "Shhhhhhhhh! Let's go!", and it will be on.

In a world of things to be thankful for, I'm thankful for the memories of a great brother.

And leftovers.

Until the next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

The Chrysler Museum of Art and SPLITTYCAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Splitty the Maul couldn't wait to get out yesterday.


I gave him my old camera so he could join in on the roadtrip fun.


Splitty was so happy he could hardly contain himself.

I stopped to fuel up the AirTrafficmobile. Splitty, knowing the Chrysler Museum didn't allow mauls into the building, decided to test out his new rig while en route to the city.


Splitty digs Taj Mahal's music.

Personally, I thought he did an excellent job given it was his first assignment.

As feared, Splitty was not allowed to enter the museum.


Splitty took it in stride. He took the time to learn more about his new camera.

The Chrysler Museum came to be courtesy of Walter P. Chrysler, Jr., son of the founder of the Chrysler Autombile Company. I 1971, he donated his extensive collection of art making the then Norfolk Museum of Arts and Sciences one of the premier art museums in the nation.

Good people doing good works deserve a shout out here at Air Traffic Mike's.


The view of the Hague from in front of the museum.


The front of the museum.


A close up of the sculture out front.



I went inside, asked a docent about the history of the museum. She explained it and suggested I start on the glass exhibit.

I got really excited. I love glass art. I would not be disappointed either.

This breathtaking piece was created this year. It's named, "Startled Jealous Viper" by its creator Stephen Rolfe Powell. It was a beautiful start to a beautiful exhibit.

As I am wont to do, I wandered around the exhibit in no particular pattern. Whatever catches my eye I go to next, even if it is in another room. Have no fear, I DO go back to see if I missed anything, but going from piece to piece is not my style.

The docent assigned to the gallery came over. She immediately took my focus off the glass. Jackie is tall, brunette, around 26 years old, with the most remarkable eyes I've ever seen on a woman.

She also knows glass art like the back of her hand.

We got along famously.

She pointed over a a gallery of Tiffany Glass. She said, "If I'm not mistaken we have the second largest collection of Tiffany Glass in the nation.".

I don't have the words, but I do have the videos.


Tiffany vases.


Tiffany lamps and windows.

I spent 30 minutes in this gallery. As fascinating as the glass was, Jackie was that much more fascinating. Sheer beauty aside, she has a wealth of knowledge on glass art. She was absolutely a delight to talk art with.

There was a lot more museum to see and the hours were running short. It was time to move on.

I'm just going to post pics for a bit.

Here are a couple of the more interesting pieces of glass art.




They also had a nice gallery of Egyptian artifacts.






More pieces from various galleries:


Ceremonial Japanese armor.


The lobby taken from the second floor.


A nice example of Norman Rockwell's art.


"Wounded Indian". Nearly life sized, pictures don't do it justice.


What art exhibit would be complete without Snoop Dog's "Pimp Cup"?

Okay, so maybe it isn't from Snoop.

He'd still look good strolling with a "Pimp Cup" looking like this.

I was really looking forward to the museum yesterday. I must say it was an outstanding.

I spent so much time there, I missed the hours for Gen. MacArthur's grave.

Hopefully, he'll be in this afternoon.

In the meantime, I'm cooking down a fryer for either chicken/sausage gumbo or chicken dressing. I'll decide in a bit.

Until the next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

Air traffic Mike, ret.

Voices Of A Midair Collision

The responsibilities that come with being an air traffic controller far exceed that of many jobs.

Other safety related, high stress jobs such as being a fireman/firewoman and policeman/policewoman have great responsibilities as well. They differ in two aspects:

1. They are reactive jobs. Both generally are called to duty by alarms or reports phoned in by the public.

2. They put their lives on the line every time they clock in.

I have nothing but the highest respect for the men and women who work in those fields.

Air traffic control, by its very nature is a proactive endeavor. It can be reactive if the controller gets behind the workload, but that's a story for another time. As far as putting their lives on the line, I'd remind one and all that the wreckage rarely hits the Control Tower/TRACON/En Route Center. Controllers are more likely to die of heart failure rather than being killed in the line of work. The main difference in responsibility is that if a mistake goes unchecked, ATC has the opportunity to kill hundreds in the air and more on the ground.


Here's amateur footage of the crash taken from the Hudson River.

Pretty brutal, isn't it.

There were nine souls aboard the two aircraft. None survived.

Because accidents/incidents happen, and because of the liability that can stem from either, the FAA keeps audio tapes of all transmissions made between ATC/aircraft, ATC/ATC via telephone lines, and in many cases telephones to the outside world. Newer radar displays also permit video replay of what happened. Such was the case on this fateful day. When an accident occurs, voice recordings are generally the first thing that will be listened to. What the manager/staff/investigators should hear is precise phraseology, professional conversations regarding any landline communications, and hopefully a clue as to what went wrong.

What they got was this:

Teterboro Tower Tape From Midair Collision

The tape covers 30 minutes. The opening part, with the controller talking about a dead cat, is key to the time frame in which the plane and helicopter collided. I strongly urge you to give it a listen in its entirety.

If you want to hear a shorter version, here's an animated version with partial recordings from the NTSB.

About 12:40 minutes into the recording, N71MC (November Seven One Mike Charlie is what you're listening for) calls ready for takeoff. Keep listening. The plane is given its takeoff clearance, is subsequently radar identified (listen for the phrase "Radar contact"), and the controller exchanges traffic between N71MC and an inbound helicopter. Pretty standard stuff. The term "Radar Contact" advises the pilot he has been identified on radar and will receive traffic advisories and in some cases separation services. In this case, N71MC was operating outside of the Class B airspace around New York City and traffic advisories would be given as an additional service. Unfortunately, the helicopter involved here was not the helicopter N71MC would end up hitting.

What happens next is unconscionable. The controller gets on the recorded phone, and resumes a conversation about a dead cat the tape opens up on. He misses the pilot reading back an incorrect frequency for Newark. Newark would next have had the responsibilty to issue traffic to the departing Piper. It was during this time that the VFR target (the sightseeing helicopter) popped up. The New York TRACON and the controller had discussions about the Piper during this time. The traffic had become a factor for N71MC, they needed to be in radio contact with them and issue them a turn to avoid the traffic.

They never got the chance. N71MC never called.

The result was every air traffic controller's and pilot's nightmare. A midair.

You might ask why an air traffic controller working airplanes was on the phone talking to someone about a non job related topic. You might ask, "Where was the supervisor during this and why didn't he stop the controller from engaging in such behavior?".

Well, the fact of the matter is that the controller should NOT have been engaging in that activity. It is spelled out very clearly. The supervisor, who was supposed to be in the tower, was absent from the work quarters. His job is to provide general supervision. He in fact was not.

Negligence on the part of both.

Normally, these actions would have gone unnoticed by the FAA, the media, and even the most of the employees. It was a quiet day just short of noon.

What could possibly go wrong?

Well, to quote myself:

"Complacency is catastrophe's doorman."

I came to that conclusion the hard way once upon a time.

They were complacent.

One man distracted by non-job related behavior.

One man missing from his assigned area.

Nine people dead.

The FAA has proposed termination in both cases. There is an appeal process in place for matters as such.. I'm quite sure both will avail themselves of it and that of legal counsel.

Both, it seems, were derelict of duty. It will be an extremely difficult battle for them to win.

I have no doubt both men are deeply sorry for what happened that day. Myself and every air traffic controller/supervisor I worked with cared about pilot's and passenger's lives with all their hearts. I saw many a controller break down in tears after close calls and fatal accidents.

It was, and is, a private Hell that is almost impossible to explain.

I can sympathize for the pain they must be going through.

I can sympathize more for the families of the victims.

My opinion as to whether the men deserve firing will remain private.

You folks can draw your own conclusions.

Until next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

Karma vs. My Camera, A New Title To The Blog, and A Qucik Bruce Update

There's a reason why I put my karma on the line everyday.

It's because I'm a dumbass.

Yesterday, while perusing Facebook, one of my friends was inquiring about a new digital camera.

I glanced across the table at mine and thought, "Man that little Nikon sure has been a *road warrior* this year. I wonder how long it will continue to take this abuse?"

An hour later I dropped it on the hard tile floor and got my answer.

It's the damnedest thing though. The video screen on the back is all screwed up. It has this fractured looking image on it, yet the actual camera/video portion still works. I just have no reference as to how the image is framed.

That just wasn't good enough for what I want to do with it.

Battered karma and wallet in hand, I went to Best Buy yesterday afternoon. I like Best Buy for these types of purchases. They had a large selection of digital cameras spanning a wide price range. For what I do, taking random shots out and about, I really didn't need a big rig. I travel light, carrying my camera in my pocket. I need for it to be handy because so many shots are fleeting.

I looked at thinline cams with rechargeable batteries. I liked the compactness, but not the rechargeable aspect. I want to know that the camera is always ready. My cell phone dies at least once a week because I'm poor about keeping up with its recharging schedule. I just can't be bothered, I'd just as soon keep an 8 pack of lithium batteries handy.

That limited my selections, but not too badly. The young lady waiting on me really knew her stuff about the products on hand. With her help, I finally decided on buying another Nikon. It is about the same size as my old one, uses the same lithium batteries, and made my learning curve a very short one. It has better zoom features, a slightly larger video screen (that works), and has better resolution at 10 megapixels.

High enough tech for what I do, low enough tech for me to understand, and a low enough price that allows me the freedom from worrying that I might wreck it.

My young sales associate pointed out that for an additional $29.99 Best Buy would throw in a 4GB memory chip, a flexible tripod/mount, and a case. The 4GB chip cost nearly that much anyway, so I opted for it. I have little use for the case, but the chip was a necessity, and the the flexipod mount gave me an immediate idea.

Splitty the Maul, through a stoke of bad luck and inspired genius will now be shooting movies from the vantage point of the passenger seat of my Highlander.

Look for upcoming short films shot in "SplittyCam".

Remember, adversity = opportunity here at Air Traffic Mike's.

Oh yeah, because there is a Memphis Mike out there on the web and in order to brand myself uniquely, you'll notice the title change.

Fear not. It'll still be the same acerbic, irreverent, introspective, grouchy ass me, just better defined.

Today the older bro and I will be installing some new electric receptacles in his house. He has a few older receptacles that are the two pronged variety. No problem, I've installed plenty of them.

Bruce took chemotherapy on Tuesday. He's a bit hoarse and feeling a bit puny, but it sure is better than where he was last week at this time. Some folks would think, "Wow, that's a rough one when you're having to work UP to get to chemotherapy.". It sucks, but we call it a "win".

Tomorrow the new camera and I have a date at the Chrysler Museum and General Douglas MacArthur's grave in downtown Norfolk.

Maybe even a "SplittyCam" film.

We shall see.

Until the next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.

Congratulations Coach Pastner And U of M Tigers!!!!

It is not often that a loss is greeted with *congrats*.

Then again, it isn't often that a college coach under contract for millions of dollars and multiple years, leaves and takes the number one recruiting class with him, thereby gutting a major program.

As a parting gift, the former coach also left a time bomb in the form of an NCAA investigation as to whether his star athlete was even eligible to play, thereby likely erasing the team's 2007-08 season and Final Four appearance.

No, without a doubt Coach Josh Pastner was left with barely a crumb in the cupboard, save the returning players and his wits.

The University of Memphis hired him after pretty much every other available NCAA Division 1 coach sniffed at the job and walked away.

His signing bonus from R.C. Johnson besides a tattered program apparently was a note written in crayon saying, "Good Luck".

The crayon note is just a rumor, the tattered program a fact.

Personally, from day one, I liked the hire. It would have been easy to ride Cal's coat tails a few more years. Josh Pastner stepped up and announced he was ready to take the helm.

I believed he was then and is now.

As you all know, I've been busy from May on with family matters. There was no way I'd have had the time to interview Coach Pastner myself.

Fortunately I have the gang over at Air Traffic Mike Heavy Industries, LLC. (the official social think tank of Air Traffic Mike) for occasions such as this.

I sent my ace U of M sports reporter, Floaty over to the University of Memphis to talk to Coach Pastner about the program, the recruiting, and what we can look forward to in the coming seasons with him at the helm.

Floaty, it's all yours.


"Thanks Mike. It's really good to be back."

Nice to have you back.


"Some retirement for you."

It's okay Floaty, things are slowly getting back on track. So what can you tell us about Coach Pastner and his plans both present and future?


"First off, he's a genuinely nice fellow."

I gather that from his interviews.


"There's just one thing......."

Oh? What's that.


"He's really white."

Well, shouldn't we expect that given the fact he is a white guy of Jewish heritage?


"Um, Mike? I don't think you understand what I'm saying here. He's really, really white."

Floaty, I would remind you that I have little tolerance for stereotypes. It is NOT in keeping with our policies.


"No Mike, I mean....please hear me out."

What? Is it because the guy doesn't drink, smoke, or dance? Is it because the harshest word from his mouth is "Dang"?

Floaty, I'll NOT hear another word of this.


"Damn it Air traffic, look at this picture!"


HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


"I told you!"

Holy cow Floaty, he could give the Pilsbury Doughboy(tm) a run for his pigment.


"I caught up with him on the sidelines at St. Louis the day before the Tigers/Jayhawks game."

I need to catch my breath. Go ahead and roll the interview Floaty.

*click*


"Coach Pastner, thanks for agreeing to this interview. I know time is short, so let's get to it. Where do you see the present Tiger men's basketball program?"


"Right over there in Section 108! Hi guys!!!!!"


"Um, no Coach...I mean where do you see them going?"


"Floaty, we have strict rules on my team. They'll be going right over there in the locker room if they need to relieve themselves at ANY point before, during, or after the game."


"Yeah....okaaaay..... Coach, I tell you what. Tell us about how the Summer went as far as getting the remaining guys in shape, your recruiting efforts, and what you expect this season to look like."


"Well we got off to a rough start. Coach Cal sort of took everything. He took the recruits. He took the coaching staff. He took the secretary. GOSH DANG IT, HE EVEN TOOK THE ROAST BEAST!!!!!!!"


"Easy Coach. Watch the *D-bombs* We're recording this."


"Sorry Floaty. I get really jacked up when some putz *Dr. Seusses* me."


"We all do. No prob."


"Anyway, we went to Wal-Mart over in West Memphis, replaced the roast beast, and hit the recruiting trail."


"Must have been rough, especially after just getting married. Where is your lovely bride?"


"Right over there in Section 108! Hi honey!!!!!"


"Okay, the roast beast problem solved, new marriage underway, and on the road to recruit."


"We got on the road and found our first likely candidate. He had great grades, great presence, and Coach Cal said he was being recruited heavily."


"That's terriffic Coach. Who is he?"


"Well, just so happens he's here tonight."


"Really? Where?"


"Right over there in Section 108 finishing up his sliders! Hey Eddy, Hi!!!"




"Nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!"


"Oh YEAH!!!!!!! It's "Sweaty Eddie" Alberghetti!!! He was the biggest name available. I don't know how we're going to get all of "Alberghetti" on the back of his jersey."


"Don't worry about the size of his name. It should fit around his waist."


"Don't worry Floaty, he's a guy we can build our program around."


"You're gonna have to. He's already got his own zip code."


"Floaty, tell Air Traffic Mike an all the viewers that the U of M men's basketball program is back on track!"


"Okay coach, I sure will. Before I go, I understand YOU coined the slogan for the 2009-10 men's team. We've yet to see it or hear it. Can you give us the scoop and tell us what it is?"


"Sure will Floaty. Okay? Here goes."

*drum roll*

(baritone voice over from announcer)
"Your University Memphis Tigers..a proud past...a brighter future...where will we take you next?............"



"DAAAAAAANNNNG....RIGHT OVER THERE IN SECTION 108!!!!!!!!."

*click*

Thanks Floaty. Take the rest of the day off with pay.


"Thanks ATM!"

Anytime Floaty.

As for me, I'm outta here too.

Until the next time, all y'all take care of yourselves.

Air Traffic Mike, ret.